Maintaining
By Pixelgoddess

Warnings: Yaoi, Yuri. Smut. Violence, rape, angst, sap. A Goku that started out cheerful, but is now as angst-filled as Vegeta. A nice dyke Chichi.
Pairings: Goku/Vegeta, Radditz/Vegeta, Chichi/OC. (Okay, okay, I don't like original characters either, but I think you will forgive me. Besides, she won't mess with your favorite Saiyans at all.) Maybe some other pairs if the mood strikes me.
Summary: Vegeta's life has begun to fall apart, his control slipping away. Will Goku be able to help him hold on, or will he become another victim of Vegeta's past? Yaoi - G/V, R/V, Yuri - CC/OC
Disclaimer: Of course I don't own them. Honestly. How could you think that? I am a goddess, not an extremely wealthy Japanese man.

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Chapter 32 - Daze

He got to the door and fumbled with the code for a moment before remembering Bulma had made changes and he could use his ki to unlock the Gravity Room. He impatiently waited for the doors to open before he finally burst into the chamber.

"Oh GodS! VEGETA!" Goku shouted, panicked.

Goku rushed to his prince's side. Vegeta was lying unconscious in a twisted, bleeding heap on the floor. How could he have missed this? Why didn't he IT home? Why did he stay with Piccolo so long? He should have been here, protecting his prince. He touched his neck to check his pulse and Vegeta's pain poured through him at the contact. Who could have done this?

Goku quickly examined him, trying to determine if it was safe to move him. His leg was shattered, bone piercing the skin - a heavy steel rod lay nearby. Most of his other injuries were minor - typical of heavy training. Except... there was a pool of blood by Vegeta's head... He gently slid his fingers through the matted hair and winced when he realized the damage was more severe than a bloody cut.

"It's going to be okay, Vegeta," he said calmly, a soothing purr rumbling beneath the words. "I'm going to take care of you."

He hesitated a second, trying to decide the best method to heal his prince. He was unconscious, and getting a Senzu into him would be difficult. But the only other alternative was Dende, and he wasn't prepared to put Vegeta into his hands. Decision made, he rested his hand on a battered chest and IT'd them to the bedroom floor.

He quickly retrieved the Senzu beans and returned to kneel at his prince's side. There had been no reaction from Vegeta yet, but he continued a comforting purr as he got a bean. He frowned for a moment, thinking, before chewing the bean himself, softening it, then pressing their lips together, slipping it into Vegeta's mouth with his tongue.

"Please Vegeta, try to swallow," he pleaded, watching carefully for any reaction. All he needed was for Vegeta to absorb even a small quantity - when he could chew on his own, he could have a whole bean. He breathed a sigh of relief when Vegeta's eyelids began to flutter.

"It's okay Vegeta. I'm here," he purred, stroking a bruised cheek. He brushed his tail over Vegeta's face and neck as he waited for the bean to do its work. Finally his prince's eyes slitted open and his mouth moved as he tried unsuccessfully to speak.

"Shhh...it's alright. I'm going to give you a Senzu." He ignored the blood that now covered him and carefully cradled Vegeta, propping his head up so it would be easier for him to eat the bean. Besides physical pain, he could feel confusion from his prince. He slid the Senzu between parted lips and relaxed as Vegeta started to chew.

Vegeta groggily stared up in bewilderment at dark eyes watching him. Where was he? What had happened? Panic began filling him before he realized he was safe, in Kakarott's arms.

"Ka-," he breathed.

"You're going to be okay, Vegeta."

He relaxed as Kakarott's ki surrounded him, warming him, protecting him. He felt the purr in his companion's chest and rumbled in response. He didn't understand why he was still so disoriented. He had eaten the Senzu - his physical injuries were healed. What had happened?

"I found you unconscious in the Gravity Room and IT'd you to our room," Kakarott answered his unspoken question.

He struggled to remember, fighting the haze in his mind. The Gravity Room - he had been training...arguing with his demon. But he hadn't been over-doing it. He wanted to test the changes the woman had made. He always kept careful control during initial runs.

He felt the fear creeping up his tail, immediately blocked from Kakarott, as he realized what had happened. He had blacked out again...there was a huge gap in his memory.

"Vegeta..."

He stared into brown eyes, lost.

"You're done training for the day. You're a mess. Let's get this blood washed off you."

He nodded and moved to stand, only to find himself firmly encircled by Kakarott's strong arms. He slid an arm around his companion's neck and pressed himself against the comforting heat.

Goku scooped up his prince, barely holding back his tears. Vegeta hadn't said a word - hadn't even been able to say his name. He just watched Goku with shadowed eyes and didn't resist as he was picked up and carried into the bathroom. He didn't spend any time admiring the luxurious room - instead he carefully set Vegeta in a chair and went to run water in the tub.

"Why don't you get undressed, Vegeta?" he asked, as he opened drawers and cabinets, searching for soap and towels.

Vegeta sat and watched as Kakarott went around the room gathering things. He felt so disconnected - worn out. He was too tired to worry - Kakarott would take care of him...he was safe now. Moving and thinking was such an effort...he was content to admire his companion's body as he moved. Muscles rippled and flexed without effort as Kakarott shed his clothes with unthinking grace.

He purred as his companion came toward him and kneeled. Kakarott made a sound - it might have been his name - and he reached out to brush his fingers over soft lips. ::Beautiful.:: Chocolate eyes closed as he grazed fingertips over them, bringing them to his own lips to taste the moisture on them. Crying? Kakarott was sad? He leaned forward to kiss him - he would make his companion feel better.

Goku couldn't hide the tears that streamed down his face. Vegeta was in a daze, just staring at him hollow-eyed. Whatever had happened had damaged his prince - even the Senzu hadn't helped. The strange ki was twisted with Vegeta's own - Vegeta's was stronger, but they seemed to be...merging. He couldn't feel any emotions - even the earlier confusion - from him at all. He closed his eyes in sorrow as soft lips brushed his. This wasn't his prince - this was a sad shadow.

He carefully undressed Vegeta and carried him to the water, sitting in the huge tub with Vegeta in his lap, leaning back against his chest. He purred and murmured comforting words as he gently smoothed soap over scarred skin. The prince's chestnut tail thumped against his thigh with contentment and Goku could see a peaceful smile on his face.

Goku was struggling with himself - trying to decide what to do. If Vegeta's injuries were too much for Senzu, he would have to take him to Dende. But the thought of leaving his prince in the boy's hands... But he couldn't wait too long, or else the damage might become permanent. He was deep in thought as he rubbed the washcloth over Vegeta's shoulder and was surprised to hear a hiss of pain.

"Vegeta? What is it?"

Vegeta breathed something that sounded like 'Hurts'.

Goku examined the area more closely and was surprised to find a deep red scar on the back of Vegeta's shoulder. He had seen a mark there before, but it had never looked this angry and livid. He lightly brushed his fingers over it, amazed at how hot it was to the touch. Why hadn't it been healed?

Vegeta's head snapped around and glared at him with a stranger's eyes. "Leave it alone!"

Goku jerked his hand away and stared at him in shock, mouth open. The strange ki had spiked when the prince spoke and he instantly knew he was looking at the voice. Then the white ki dropped just as quickly. The anger in his eyes vanished. He felt a wave of fear pour through Vegeta as a battle took place behind his dark eyes, their normal glittering ebony appearing for a long moment.

"Kakarott?" Vegeta asked before the fight was lost and they faded back into the muddy black.

"Vegeta?" he softly asked.

Vegeta felt like he was surrounded by treacle. It was too thick to move, too hard to fight. Why should he fight? Kakarott was holding him. He was warm and safe. But a tiny part of him wanted him to fight, wanted him to resist. He heard the voice coming out of his mouth, echoed by a whisper of the voice in his head..~.>>>>Leave it alone!<<<<~

He struggled to hold on when the voice went silent, to tell Kakarott that he was all right - and then that chance faded. He felt the light fade, and all he knew was his companion was sad.

He pushed, trying to pull himself out of the pit he had slid into. The voice was there, silently poking and prodding him - what did it want?

~>>>>Stupid monkey, let go.<<<~

He felt a momentary flash of surprise. The voice was whispering to him. He looked up at his companion and smiled. Good, Kakarott hadn't heard.

~>>>>Always have to be difficult...<<<<~

Goku lifted Vegeta out of the tub and began drying him with a towel. The prince didn't help, didn't resist. He just stood where he was placed and watched Goku's every move. Tomorrow, he promised. If Vegeta wasn't better tomorrow he would go to Dende.

~>>>>This would be easier on you if you didn't resist so much.<<<<~

He started to dry himself off, watching as Vegeta played with his own tail. His prince seemed so disjointed, so disconnected. He couldn't read a single emotion from him. The white ki was there again, cycling against the waves of Vegeta's ki. He knew the voice was talking again, but he couldn't hear it as long as he was being blocked.

~>>>>This is your own fault for fighting me.<<<<~

Goku turned from hanging up the towels just in time to see Vegeta staring at him with the voice's icy eyes as he firmly grabbed his chestnut tail in both hands and snapped it.

TBC
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